"There are more unconvincing hardmen in politics than in 500 episodes of EastEnders. George Osborne, scion of one of our finest fabric and wallpaper families, has been jeering blokeishly that the PM might 'bottle it' on the election front. 'Bring it on,' he scoffs. One can only hope the response runs along the lines of 'Time for your pasting, wallpaper boy!'. It would certainly maintain the level of debate.
"Or think back to David Blunkett, forever talking about 'nailing' criminals when he was home secretary. Blunkett, of course, had four houses, was best friends with the Duchess of Devonshire, and seemed to like Annabel's. Yet he appeared to be positioning himself as the SW1 version of Richard Harris in This Sporting Life. Only in Westminster can you get away with this." —Marina Hyde